All posts in our colorful life
Disclaimer. This is straight-up a home/diy/lifestyle blog but this site is just an extension of me, not an accurate picture of the whole. Today, I wanted to breakdown a little of that wall by talking about the recent shooting in California and the conversation it spurred on Twitter. I don’t want to do this because it’s the topic du jour or to stir the pot. I want to talk about it because it’s important. Not just to woman, but to a successful society.
I refuse to contribute to the growing amount of exposure dedicated to a sick, sick individual so I will not mention the shooter’s name. What this person did was reprehensible and it has weighed heavily on my mind since last weekend. As is protocol after events like these, people delve into the well-rehearsed “why did this happen?” conversation. Things we’ve all said and heard and read before. “It’s lack of gun control.” “It’s a testament to the crumbling state of the mental health system in our country.” People argue until they are blue in the face and their keyboards are shattered. But the hashtag #yesallwomen that has emerged in the past week is an interesting (albeit unfortunate) conversation that, in the light of tragedy, may birth a new conversation.
Plain and simple, the shooter hated women. Hated them for not lusting for him. Hated them for not chasing after him, but instead being with other men. Hated them for having choice over their own bodies. His plan was to seek out as many woman (and men they chose to be with over him, “the ultimate gentlemen”) and make them pay. Pay for the freedom of choosing.
The purpose behind #yesallwoman is to bring the topic of the misogyny and oppression that all woman experience into the harsh light of reality. It’s not just the hot ones, or the 20-somethings. It’s all of us.
Because I always carry my keys primed as a weapon in parking lots and on sidewalks.
Because I always get nervous walking past men alone.
Because even though I have never personally experienced sexual assault or violations, I know not to drink from a glass I’ve put down in social situations.
Because I lock my doors immediately after getting in my car, and then check the lock again any time I come to a stop and someone is standing relatively close to my vehicle.
Because sometimes the only hint an aggressive “flatterer” will take is “I’m married,” which translates into “I’m already someone’s property”.
Because for every moment of self-loathing I’ve experienced over my weight, I’ve had a moment of thankfulness that being fat is probably a deterrent to aggressors.
Because porn is a fantasy. Woman who choose to be in (reputable) porn have protection. They have signed detailed contracts and have a safety net of professionals around them. Forcing yourself on a woman without her consent is assault.
In rapid response to #yesallwomen, #notallmen has surfaced as well filled with defensive messages about men’s own individual behavior. And it’s important to note that we know. We know not all men are rapists and sexists. We are 100% aware. Our population would be a whole hell of a lot smaller if they were. The point of #yesallwomen is not to disparage the male gender as a whole, but to share experiences and simply let men know the other perspective.
My husband is a great man. He is kind and loving and a proud feminist. But he’s also a middle-class, white male. I would guess he couldn’t personally relate to any of the experiences I listed above. Because as a white man, he is susceptible to the smallest amount fear. He has no reason to do some of the things I’ve been taught to do since middle school. To him, I might even seem a little paranoid.
So, to women out there, you should now that you are not along and your voice does matter and even if there are no sweeping changes brought about by this tragedy, don’t think that the conversation isn’t important. And to the good and gentle men out there, we are not trying to paint the entirety of your gender as the crazies. It is simply an opportunity for you to listen and gain a new perspective, because even though you might not experience these issues first-hand, they do happen and they are relevant.
Feminism is for equality between the genders. Not for female superiority. Sure we have our fair share of crazies too, but the majority of us out there engaging in #yesallwoman only want to be equals and to live free from fear of other human beings.
Two other great articles on this topic:
- Not All Men: How Not to Derail Discussion of Women’s Issues
- Let the Record Reflect by Elizabeth at REWM
Happy April! Did y’all have any luck with April Fools Day shenanigans yesterday? Sadly, or not so sadly, there were no pranks here.
Today we’re officially closing the books for March with out monthly Goings On + Photo Ops instagram recap! Now, I’m a little short on instagram photos this month, but in an odd turn of events half of the photos I do have are of my face. (Maybe I’ve been listening to that #selfie song too much!)
- Went to The Minimalists book signing & the Cheesecake Factory
- Embarrassed to admit my top played song right now is “Talk Dirty”
- Snow day for Josh. Delay for me.
- Glad to have a friend at work… even if he is a crazy sports nut.
- Emerald Eagle Honors at the Meyerson
- Decided to take tomorrow off. Lucky to be able to do that.
- Leah & Riley’s wedding at Ashton Gardens + the coolest Violin Guy.
- Stayed at the Wildwood Inn and spent the day in Denton
- Daylight Savings has me totally thrown off but I’m ready for the sun
- Renewed our lease for one. more. year.
- Day 1 with Bambi, my personal trainer
- Planning projects to keep my sanity for one more year in 816
- A record 3 hour phone call between Josh and Richard
- Dinner on the patio at Gloria’s
- Rainy day errands in a fancy rental car
- My first full strength training workout by myself
- Josh’s first ever Candy Crush experience
- Flirty emails are fun to send!
- Josh had an AC meeting, so I watched Mean Girls to pass the time
- Bambi nearly killed me in the gym. But it feels good to be doing something.
- Late dinner at Oddfellows to shake off our taxes
- Enjoyed driving our speedy hybrid rental during errands
- Being productive is super hard sometimes
- The restlessness of weight loss has started to set in
- Maybe we’ll stay in Dallas a few more years?
- Reevaluating what I want to do… again!!
- Big, exciting family news!
- Finally watched Rain Man and digitized all of my recipes. Accomplished all around.
- Bought a course to actually learn how to use my DSLR!
- 21st workout of the month! Met my goal!
- Enjoying having the windows open before the heat rolls in!
Anything exciting in your March? Share below!
Hello and happy Monday! I wanted to take today and just update y’all on what’s going on here at Two Live Colorfully. If you come around often, you’ve probably noticed a little less action. Well, that’s because Josh and I are figuring out exactly where we want to go in the next few years and how to get there.
First things first, we’re officially staying in Dallas for one more year. We’ve signed another 12 month lease for our current apartment. We are knee deep in “saving for a house” mode, so it made the most sense to stay where we are while we prepare. Honestly, I wasn’t too psyched about this, because I’m worried about running out of projects and ideas to share with you all over the next year here, but when it comes down to it, there is still plenty of work to be done.
We’re still going to be continuing with our minimalist-lite series as well as moving decor around, upgrading a few things, and maybe even trying a few new “apartment friendly” techniques just for fun!
The other thing that has been taking up most of my time is a new resurgence of working out and eating right. It’s not something I’ve ever really talked about here, but I’ve struggled with weight issues for as long as I remember. And, up until now it always felt like I would have time later to sort it out and get healthy. But you know what? That time is now! I’m officially an adult and there is no longer an excuse to be unhealthy. (Not that there ever really was an excuse.) If you follow me on instagram, you might have seen that I’ve hired a personal trainer to help me out. I’ve committed to six full months with her. For the past few weeks, this is what has been dominating my extra brain space.
I know Two Live Colorfully has been about home decorating and DIY, but I’d like to bring a bit more of our actual life into this our corner of the internet. I’m not sure of the exact details yet, but I’d really love to share a few health and fitness updates with you. Not to take over the site, but just to share a little more of our colorful life. Nobody has a perfect life, even if that’s all you see on the internet. People have struggles and hard decisions to make and I want to be someone who isn’t afraid to share mine with the chance that it could help someone else.
So, three months into 2014 and this is where we are. Lots of changes happening and lots of things to be excited about. I hope you’ll stick around to see where this goes!
Here we are again. At the end of another month. I hope you are all wrapping up an awesome February and are ready for March and hopefully some spring time weather! Down here in Texas, we’ve been flip-flopping between hot and cold like it’s no one’s business! Like Wednesday was in the 30’s and today’s high is 80F! Even though I totally don’t mind the cold weather, I wish dear Mother Nature would just pick one!
- Who knew there was an 8AM on Saturdays? Productive day today.
- Basically had an Office marathon playing the background all day.
- An awesome coworker brought in authentic gumbo for the whole office!
- Bought the Lord of the Pies as a special treat (apple + caramel! Yum!)
- We’re planning a cheer party!
- SNOW DAY! Except we both still have to work.
- Watched documentary on Mitt Romney. Different perspective and good conversation.
- Feeling so adult. Underwriting to start retirement planning.
- Seriously what breakfast beats pancakes and real maple syrup?
- Cupcake baking and party prep
- Delayed start because of weather this morning. Perfect time to ice cupcakes.
- Freshman cheer party at Sunset!
- More cupcake baking! Pink Champagne this time!
- My cheesy mustache valentines were a hit with the boys at work.
- Gaining some financial momentum! Paid off a major account today!
- In Denton for cheer competition. Also met “Ferret Girl” on the square!
- Mondays are way worse after an awesome weekend.
- Gorgeous weather today. Ate lunch outside and listened to Think on NPR.
- Feeling nostalgic and watching The Titanic
- Ate lunch in the deli with a fun IT employee!
- Cheer tryouts for next year. A late and crazy night for Josh!
- Slept in, cuddled, and watched The Hobbit.
- Just one of those Sundays where I never put on pants.
- Back to the gym I go.
- Star Wars and chicken tortilla soup at home for Josh’s birthday.
- Planning some big, exciting, and scary changes for this year.
- Officially signed on with a personal trainer. Here we go.
How lovely was your February? Let’s hear the highlights below!